Atheism
5
Who are YOU to question why YOUR GOD made me too observant to fall for the bullshit that conned YOU into David Koresh's Happy Hotel of Half-Retarded Holy-Rollertude?!
How DARE YOU, thou silly mortal!? Punishment awaits you for doubting Him. Seriously, He's gonna smite you all upside your ass.
I agree with Sam Harris (the author of "The End of Faith") in that I'm suspicious of the need for a word like "atheist", I mean, what do you call the kind of person who doesn't believe that Elvis is still alive - or the person who doesn't believe in Unic0rNs?!
(Unicorns ARE mentioned in the bible, you know? More than 10 times! Do YOU still believe in unicorns? You kinda' HAVE to believe in 'em, dontcha'? ...and the "cockatrice" mentioned in the bible is a monster that's part rooster part serpent that can take over your soul by looking at you, whether you're talking about Balaam's Ass or Jeptha's daughter or the dozens of specific mentions of cannibalism, or even the verse in Psalms saying "Happy shall he be, that taketh and dasheth thy little ones against the stones" the bible is pure insanity - laid down in black and white. <~ period. That's why the preacher only talks about the parts that DON'T make you vomit day-glo! If that were the holy book of the Scientologists, you'd NEVER let them near your children, would you?)
Aaaaanyway... here's my challenge: Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence. If any believer can finish just 12 little steps across the surface of my swimming pool without getting the tops of their high-tops wet - I'll make-out a $500 check to the imaginary deity of their choice while we're uploading the video to YouTube so I can collect my million dollars from The Amazing Randi.
Until then, and in closing, let me just quote from the Holy Bible to all the "God is Pro-Life" thunder-monkeys: "And thou shalt eat the fruit of thy womb, the flesh of thy sons and of thy daughters, which the Lord thy God shall give thee" -- Deuteronomy 28:53 -- (King James Version)
(blech!) Don't eat your kids, seriously. The bible is a horror show that no one would EVER allow their children to see without being sedated and chained down. The rapture is crapture.
One more thing: WhyDoesGodHATEAmputees.Com ?