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Non-inspirational Quotations

Are you tired of the great quotations? Do you march to a different drummer? Then this list is for you.

Star Rating Scale: 1 = bad / 2 = not so good / 3 = average / 4 = good / 5 = great

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Science & Nature > Quotations

List added by GenghisTheHun on 7/11/2005

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128 List Items

1

(PJ O'Rourke) "Giving money and power to Congress is like giving whisky & car keys to teenagers

4.86 Stars | 7 ratings

2

(Ice-T on CD warning stickers) If you need a sticker to tell you that you need to guide your child, you're a dumb f**king parent anyhow.

3.89 Stars | 9 ratings

3

(Henry David Thoreau) If a man does not keep pace with his companions perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music he hears however measured and far away.

4.83 Stars | 6 ratings

4

(Mark Twain) Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

4.83 Stars | 6 ratings

5

(Voltaire) It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong.

4.71 Stars | 7 ratings

6

(UPI Stylebook) A burro is an ass. A burrow is a hole in the ground. As a reporter, you are expected to know the difference.

4.60 Stars | 5 ratings

7

(Hunter Thompson) The TV business ... is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free and good men die like dogs, for no good reason. There's also a negative side.

4.50 Stars | 6 ratings

8

(George Meany) If I'd known how old I was going to get, I'd have taken better care of myself.

5.00 Stars | 4 ratings

9

(Henry Kissinger) 90% of Politicians give the other 10% a bad name.

5.00 Stars | 4 ratings

10

(W. C. Fields) If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a damn fool about it.

4.75 Stars | 4 ratings

11

(Frank Licht, Governor of Rhode Island, campaigning for McGovern in 1972) Nixon has been sitting in the White House while George McGovern has been exposing himself to the people of the United States.

4.25 Stars | 4 ratings

12

(Winston Churchill) Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.

4.25 Stars | 4 ratings

13

(Bill Clinton, former U.S. president) Politics gives guys so much power that they tend to behave badly around women. And I hope I never get into that.

4.20 Stars | 5 ratings

14

(Britney Spears) I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada.

3.83 Stars | 6 ratings

15

(Hunter S. Thompson) I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me.

3.83 Stars | 6 ratings

16

(Brooke Shields ) Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life.

5.00 Stars | 3 ratings

17

(Johnny Carson) If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.

5.00 Stars | 3 ratings

18

(Lily Tomlin) I worry that the person who thought up Muzak may be thinking up something else.

5.00 Stars | 3 ratings

19

(Albert Einstein) Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former.

4.67 Stars | 3 ratings

20

(Bill Madlock, Baseball broadcaster) Two grand slams in a week - man, that's seven or eight ribbies right there.

4.67 Stars | 3 ratings

21

(Joseph Campbell) Computers are like Old Testament gods; lots of rules and no mercy.

4.67 Stars | 3 ratings

22

(Joseph P. Kennedy, 1936) I have no political ambitions for myself or my children.

4.67 Stars | 3 ratings

23

(Alexander Pope) Blessed is the man who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.

4.50 Stars | 4 ratings

24

(Gib Lewis, Texas Speaker of the House, to a group of people in wheelchairs on Disability Day) And now, will y'all stand and be recognized.

4.33 Stars | 3 ratings

25

(Harry S. Truman) Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day.

4.33 Stars | 3 ratings

26

(Henry Kissinger) The illegal we do immediately. The unconstitutional takes a little longer.

4.25 Stars | 4 ratings

27

(Dan Quayle) I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy ... but that could change.

4.00 Stars | 4 ratings

28

(William F. Buckley) I won't insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said.

3.75 Stars | 4 ratings

29

(Dave Barry) Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, using only their hands and feet, make some of the worst movies in the history of the world.

3.50 Stars | 4 ratings

30

(Ann Landers) The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good.

3.40 Stars | 5 ratings

31

(Alf Landon, in a campaign speech while running against FDR ) Wherever I have gone in this country, I have found Americans.

5.00 Stars | 2 ratings

32

(Bill Gates ) 640k ought to be enough for anybody.

5.00 Stars | 2 ratings

33

(Laura Dern, about the special effects in the movie Jurassic Park) You can hardly tell where the computer models finish and the real dinosaurs begin.

5.00 Stars | 2 ratings

34

(Rodney Dangerfield) Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.

5.00 Stars | 2 ratings

35

(Woody Allen) Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.

5.00 Stars | 2 ratings

36

(Abraham Lincoln) It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues.

4.50 Stars | 2 ratings

37

(Hong Kong dental advertisement) Teeth extracted by the latest methodists.

4.50 Stars | 2 ratings

38

(Jesse Ventura, Minnesota governor)Whoever designed the streets must have been drunk... I think it was those Irish guys.

4.33 Stars | 3 ratings

39

(Jane Austen) I do not want people to be agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them.

4.00 Stars | 4 ratings

40

(Ron Nessen) Nobody believes the official spokesman ... but everybody trusts an unidentified source.

4.00 Stars | 2 ratings

41

(Shirley Temple Black) I stopped believing in Santa Claus at age six when my mother took me to see him in a store and he asked for my autograph.

4.00 Stars | 2 ratings

42

(Popular Mechanics, March 1949) Where a calculator on the ENIAC is equipped with 18,000 vaccuum tubes and weighs 30 tons, computers in the future may have only 1,000 vaccuum tubes and perhaps weigh 1 1/2 tons.

3.67 Stars | 3 ratings

43

(Sen. Barbara Boxer, (D, Cal.) ) Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, "Thank God, I'm still alive." But, of course, those who died, their lives will never be the same again.

3.67 Stars | 3 ratings

44

(Ronald Reagan) The only thing worse than appearing in Doonesbury is not appearing in Doonesbury.

3.00 Stars | 3 ratings

45

"I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars - the rest I just squandered." - George Best (thanks Sarkia)

5.00 Stars | 1 ratings

46

(Buckminster Fuller) There is nothing in a caterpillar that tells you it's going to be a butterfly.

5.00 Stars | 1 ratings

47

(David Acfield) Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer.

5.00 Stars | 1 ratings

48

(David Dinkins, New York City Mayor) I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law.

5.00 Stars | 1 ratings

49

(Hunter S. Thompson) Bill Clinton does not inhale marijuana, right? You bet. Like I chew on LSD but I don't swallow it.

5.00 Stars | 1 ratings

50

(Jerry Garcia) Somebody has to do something, and I think it's just incredibly pathetic that it has to be us.

5.00 Stars | 1 ratings

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