Beliefs Required of Liberals

These are statements which, although they need never be explained by those who believe them, represent why conservatives find liberals so doggoned entertaining and amusing. (Note of Full Disclosure: None of these are original thoughts of mine, I wish I could credit the source but I've had this list for some time and there are no credits on it. )

Star Rating Scale: 1 = You're Wrong, Eschew, I Agree With This / 2 = I Think I Actually Understand this One! / 3 = This One I Could Live With . . . / 4 = Might be an Intellectual Stretch / 5 = Funniest or Most Difficult

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Politics > Ideology

List added by EschewObfuscation on 7/4/2006

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19 List Items

Being A Celebrity Qualifies One To Lecture Non-Celebrities On All Matters Political

18 reviews

3.83 Stars | 18 ratings

One Of The Most Troubling And Dangerous Things You Can Encounter In A Public School Is A Child Praying

15 reviews

3.47 Stars | 15 ratings

Any Change In The Weather Is Proof Of Global Warming

12 reviews

3.69 Stars | 13 ratings

There Was No Art Before Federal Funding

10 reviews

3.55 Stars | 11 ratings

Hillary Clinton Is A Shining Example Of A Feminist

7 reviews

4.13 Stars | 8 ratings

Self-Esteem Is More Important Than Doing Something To Deserve It

8 reviews

3.33 Stars | 9 ratings

Perjury And Obstruction Of Justice Are Impeachable Offenses If Committed By A Republican, But If A Democrat President Commits Them, They Are Harmless, Private Matters

8 reviews

3.88 Stars | 8 ratings

Trial Lawyers Are Selfless Heroes, But Doctors Are Greedy And Overpaid

6 reviews

3.67 Stars | 6 ratings

Hunters And Fishermen Do Not Care About NatureBut Pasty-Faced Activists, Who Rarely Leave Manhattan, Do

8 reviews

3.63 Stars | 8 ratings

A Small Group Of Religious Wackos In Texas Is More Threatening than A Small Group Of Religious Wackos In The Middle East

7 reviews

3.43 Stars | 7 ratings

A Group Of Largely Corrupt Bureaucrats Living In Washington Can Make Better Decisions About How YOUR Money Should Be Spent Than You Can

8 reviews

3.50 Stars | 8 ratings

A Mother Can Be Trusted To Choose Whether Her Baby Lives Or Dies But Not What School The Child Can Attend

4 reviews

3.00 Stars | 5 ratings

AIDS Virus Is Spread By A Lack Of Government Spending Rather Than A Lack Of Morality

7 reviews

2.86 Stars | 7 ratings

Government Creates Jobs But Business (particularly "Big Business") Creates Oppression

10 reviews

2.45 Stars | 11 ratings

Socialism Has Never Worked Only Because Liberals Have Never Been In Charge

5 reviews

3.20 Stars | 5 ratings

Standardized Tests Are Racist but Racial Quotas Are Not

4 reviews

2.80 Stars | 5 ratings

Global Temperatures Are Affected More By People Driving SUV's Than By Documented Changes In The Brilliance Of The Sun, Or The 90% Of Greenhouse Gases Which Occur Naturally

9 reviews

2.67 Stars | 9 ratings

Illegal Immigrants Are The New Civil Rights Movement (thanks louie)

2 reviews

3.50 Stars | 2 ratings

Taxes Aren't High Enough but ATM Fees Are Too High

4 reviews

3.00 Stars | 4 ratings

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Beliefs Required of Liberals

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