One time I asked a fat male substitute teacher if he was pregnant but that's the best I can recall.

There were many times that I really, really, wanted to, but I think there was only one time that I actually swore at a teacher. It was during college, in a course on holography and optics, The professor wasn't being too careful, and swung a laser beam around the room, directly in my eyes. I let out one instinctual, "Damn it, Doc!", before I had a chance to think.

On  a related note to this story, did you know that if you look directly into a red laser, the inside looks bluish white, with red light coming out instead? It's bizarre. But I recommend just believeing me instead of looking into the laser to find out for yourself.