Thankfully, no. Not yet, anyway. The longest was 3 or 4 days. During my mid 20's I went in for what was supposed to be minor surgery, and nearly bled to death on the table. I probably could have had a lawsuit against the doctor. It turns out I had been taking an aspirin a day (I had heard it was a "healthy" thing to do, and I figured it couldn't hurt with the hangovers either) and nobody had bothered to tell me that was a no-no when you're going in for surgery, minor or otherwise (I guess I should have known this on my own, but I didn't at the time-- I also learned I had lower blood platelets than normal; since re-uniting with my genetic relatives, I've learned this is a condition I share with other relatives-- namely, my birth mother). I had to receive a blood transfusion, and this was right around the time Rock Hudson died of AIDS. Thankfully, they had been testing the blood supply for HIV contamination for about a year at that point, but that fact didn't necessarily put my mind at ease like it should have. Neither did the awareness that I had almost bought the farm while still in my mid-20's.

Those 3 or 4 days were excruciating. I couldn't sleep; nurses kept checking my blood pressure every 3 or 4 hours. Initially, I was on a liquid diet, but when the doctors did finally deign to give me solid food, it was nutritious, tasteless excrement like "tuna burgers" (all I could think at the time was--- "WTF?!?!?"). At one point, a burly nurse entered my room prepared to give me an enema, and I had to argue quite forcefully before "convincing" her that I had been on a liquid diet and didn't need it.

I shared my room with a poor old man who couldn't make it to the bathroom, and had to urinate in a plastic receptacle. He proved unequal to the task, and often pressed the buzzer to summon the nurse (who never responded in a timely manner), gasping, "I have to pee. I have to pee. Bad." I felt for the guy, but I sure wasn't gonna help him.

At one point, I was visited by a priest, who seemed friendly, commenting on my reading matter ("Dead City" by Shane Stevens) and leaving some of his own. I didn't mind the visit (it wasn't a hard-sell) but on the day I was due to leave, a group of Hispanic Born-Again Christians were going from room to room, harassing their captive audiences, and I had to hurry my parents along as they helped me pack my few belongings so we could vacate the premises before an unpleasant confrontation took place. By the time I got home, I had a wicked headache, and no one had thought to provide me with any pain pills.

I guess if someday I have to go again, I'll go (do I have a choice?). But I can't think of anything I'd rather do less. Die, maybe.

Fortunately not, and I've not had too many trips to them either. I think to date I've been twice when I was very little for cracking my head open (once because I climbed up a bookcase and it fell on me), and then once several months ago when I injured my hand at Judo. So all in all, not bad really :-)

Yes, but thankfully has been a while and hopefully it will stay that way.

No, never had to spend so much time at the hospital.

And hopefully I never will. Perhaps genetics are on my side: my 81 year old grandmother has never had to go to the hospital for any ailment. I guess some people are just born with better health.

Yes, I have spent more than a week in the hospital. Not something that I would like to revisit any time too soon.

Yes, twice.

I'm not planning to go for the hat-trick.

I was a sickly child with asthma (and I still have it today, unfortunately), and anything would aggravate it. But what motivated me to get well quick was to get out of the hospital each time I went in. My family is mostly in the medical field and work at all the hospitals in our area, but I have this crippling fear of being a patient at a hospital. I think I'm now a lot stronger, and I try to keep in shape, but the thought of being in a hospital scares me even today! Weird, but true.

Update: Son of a BITCH! I JINXED MYSELF! Cancer relapsed and after another round of chemotherapy I've had to receive a bone marrow transplant. Tonight will be my 24th consecutive night in the hospital.

7/10/2008 - * Thankfully no. I went through chemotherapy for lymphoma during the past year and the longest continuous stay I had was just 4 days. It was enough to drive me nuts, so I will be glad to stay out of any longer stays. 

Yes, sometimes, and there will be more. There are health people, and people without health. I'm in the second group.