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Masturbation

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Added on 12/01/2003
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107 Reviews

thepeople
05/03/2009

Masturbation 1

If people do it, its fine as long as they keep it to themselves.

One time, I went to a beach and some wierd hippie guy with a huge one was pullin on it.

That was gross so I left. A co-worker asked me to take him to that place.
He thought it was ok and wanted me to get naked.
That is why gay (or almost gay) people need to "anounce" themselves so there will be no mixups.

All I wanted to do was go swimming in the freaken lake.

I did not want to see a live beat off demo.

My day was ruined because of a pud whacker.

I told the coworker it would be best for us not to socialize.

I know the buddy system is supposed to be safe, but I swim alone now.
I'm not into meat gayzing.

Join to vote! 0 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

HistoryFan
12/19/2008

Masturbation 2

I'm gonna go against the grain and say yes to this one.  Excessive masterbation can be unhealthy.  Masterbation itself is not a sin according to my Christian faith but lust is a sin and lust and masterbation pretty much go together.

Join to vote! 1 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

krazedkat
12/16/2008

Masturbation 5

I don't really get what's bad about it :D

Join to vote! 0 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

XAgent
12/15/2008

Masturbation 5

Doctors say its even good for your health.

Join to vote! 2 Helpful / 0 Funny / 2 Agree / 0 Disagree

OrangeCharlie
12/15/2008

Masturbation 5

It's a healthy natural part of life and nothing to be ashamed of. It can be done solo or with another person and anyone who claims they have never masturbated, whether alone or with someone, is a liar.

Join to vote! 9 Helpful / 4 Funny / 1 Agree / 0 Disagree

uncnc08
12/15/2008

Masturbation 4

Meh...there are far worse habits I can think of besides this.I mean unless your doing it and avoiding things like,working,washing,communicating with the outside world then Yeah it might what you would call a bad habit.

Join to vote! 6 Helpful / 0 Funny / 2 Agree / 0 Disagree

Christophino
11/02/2008

Masturbation 4

I had an interestinbg experience. usually when I maturbbate or have my wife do it she or i incorporate osme sort of anal penetration be it with fruit / finger or dildo but  at he weekend I went to a nudist beach ( i usually visit my local normanl beach in my g string as I havea tanned waxed butt and I lay on the sand and this guy lay down next to me and started masturbating me in front of everyone, males and females.  No one paid any attention to him so I let him finish and came all over my belly. I then went nude into the sea, cleaned off and went home.  Theres something different

Join to vote! 0 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

vikingscool
06/12/2008

Masturbation 5

I love it!

Join to vote! 0 Helpful / 1 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

Molfan
04/23/2008

Masturbation 3

to each their own. just don't do it in front of me or in public and I do not care.

Join to vote! 1 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

FranksWildYear s
04/22/2008

Masturbation 5

I'm not sure how the rating scale works for this one. There are three things that, if practiced, can prevent masterbation from becoming a bad habit, a modicum of restraint, a polite level of discretion, and a good technique. 

And for the best quote on the subject, the always reliable Woody Allen once said that masterbation is like playing Bridge, if you don't have a good partner you need a good hand. 

Join to vote! 9 Helpful / 1 Funny / 1 Agree / 0 Disagree

decalod85
01/05/2008

Masturbation 5

What the hell are you saving it for?

Join to vote! 0 Helpful / 3 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

drkseph
01/05/2008

Masturbation 1

It's safer than having sex, no risk of getting STDs or a kid. And theres nothing bad about it unless your doing it way too much or in public places.

Join to vote! 0 Helpful / 0 Funny / 2 Agree / 0 Disagree

dude1984
12/10/2007

Masturbation 5

The only reason it can be a bad habit is for the risk of injury, which is minimal.

Join to vote! 0 Helpful / 2 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

HelloKitty09
09/21/2007

Masturbation 3

 

I don’t give a rat’s ass if you spank your monkey.  But if you’re going to do it,  you better make it quick before Ceiling Cat(or parents) catch you.  

Join to vote! 8 Helpful / 2 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

Astromike
09/18/2007

Masturbation 5

Quite contrary.  Event when I had girls friends, it was something I looked forward to!!  Feels GREAT!

Join to vote! 3 Helpful / 0 Funny / 1 Agree / 0 Disagree

annalouise
08/17/2007

Masturbation 1

Thats not a bad habit.I do it all time.Your partner if you have one can't be available 24hrs a day to fulfill your needs so you just take care of your own.

Join to vote! 2 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

SilverFox
08/08/2007

Masturbation 5

Oscargamblesfro's comment on masturbation (BTW, what were you smokin' at the time, dude?): "Wiseguy wrote Maggie Thatcher 5 times- forget about choking the chicken that'll make you want to choke... period... don't know too many people with a thing for old authoritarian British men in drag, but I guess there's a first for everything..."

SilverFox: Hey, oscargamblesfro below. I know. I know exactly what you mean. I think I do. Maybe I do, but I'm not absolutely certain, so let me ask you this. WTF are you saying? You thought about Maggie Thatcher five times in a row trying to get yourself into an erotic mood, but you couldn't do the deed because your mental picture morphed into a chicken being choked by a British drag queen, but you're hoping that it will work the next time, which would be a first for you? Got it.

As for me, I'm trying to remember if it's a bad habit. It's been soooooo long. But I'm not one to brag, I mean, complain, or something. The blow-up doll I got who looks like Jennifer Connelly does the trick. Not literally a trick, you know, since I don't have to pay for it, or her, or whatever you'd call it, or her, or. . . . Damn, where was I? I know, I was feeling up my Jennifer Connelly doll, but it wasn't doing the trick. Not literally a trick, you know, since I didn't have to pay. . . . Yawn. Damn, I'm tired. Guess I'll hit the sack. With my Jennifer Connelly doll. That should do the trick. Not literalllllyyyyyy. . . . (Loud snores echo throughout the RIA corridors, which lead to the RateItAll website, fondly known as RIA, unfortunately disrupting the efforts of oscargamblesfro, who's trying to conjure up a better-looking image of Maggie Thatcher for the fifth time, if you know what I, I mean, he means. He dreams, he dreams dreams of how he would explain Maggie Thatcher to a British drag queen, about how Maggie Thatcher is a spy posing as a British drag queen named Kenneth, but he can't quite get there and mumbles something quite unintelligible. . . . Wait, that's not right. He dreams he's talking in code given to him by the CIA, or was it the RIA, or maybe it was RIA that screwed up the code so no one could understand the message. What's the message, Kenneth? Was I using the wrong frequency? Kenneth, what is the frequency? Oscargamblesfro: I'd Rather Dan told you. That's it! Dan Rather, Dan Rather screwed up the code as he tried to pass it to Kenneth on the street, but he used the wrong frequency because he was attacked by a wacko who mysteriously demanded "Kenneth, what is the frequency?"]. Brilliant deduction, oscargamblesfro. [Newsflash, read about it here: Dan Rather has identified the man he says beat him up on the street in 1986 while demanding to know "Kenneth, what is the frequency?"] Gotta hand it to you, oscargamblesfro. But I don't have too, since you already have gotten back to the matter in hand, err, matter at hand, or are you too preoccupied with dreams of Jennifer Connelly doing the deed with Maggie Thatcher while being surreptitiously spied on by a disapproving authoritarian drag queen named Kenneth, but where? In Britain?

BTW, those of the female persuasion seem to be underrepresented in this topic. Too modest? Not an interesting discussion for you? Can't pick up any new tricks? Not literally tricks, since you don't have to pay for what you read here, if you know what I mean. Is that mean? I mean, sometimes you can pick up new tricks on these kinds of forums, about forums, errr, foursomes, even threesomes, though I wouldn't know about that, 'cuz Jennifer gets really jealous if I even dream about stuff like that, even though oscargamblesfro says it's OK, you know. Gotta go.

Join to vote! 3 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

Loerke
08/08/2007

Masturbation 5

Masturbation should be mandatory. For folks in prison, that is. They need their private time, just like the rest of us. It would solve a lot of problems.

Join to vote! 6 Helpful / 1 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

Victor83
07/30/2007

Masturbation 2

Wow....genius...think of all the time and money to be saved here. Do away with jail time, stop smoking programs, rehab...just hold masturbation clinincs.

Join to vote! 4 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

Yogurt
06/13/2007

Masturbation 5

Just do it on your own time and in private please.

Join to vote! 4 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

StirbNichtVorM ir
06/06/2007

Masturbation 3

Long distance relationships can suck, so why not? It also gives you something to do if you're bored.

Join to vote! 1 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

kj7770
04/25/2007

Masturbation 4

better than nothing

Join to vote! 3 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

blue47
04/25/2007

Masturbation 5

Hey young people, If you use your left hand it'll feel like someone else!

Wasn't it Rodney Dangerfield who said, "Poor! We were so poor if I hadn't been a boy, I'd had nothing to play with?" 

Or, how about the old joke....Little boy gets caught by his mother masterbating. She screams and hollers and tells him it will make him go blind. Little boy says, " Well can I just do it 'til I need glasses?"

 

Join to vote! 6 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree
Masturbation 5

True, you might be doing it wrong...here, move over and let Schaddy-baby help you...too bad those masturbation sleeves don't come with French cuffs...I got some old cuff links I'd like to use again.

Join to vote! 3 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

BlueOrchid
04/23/2007

Masturbation 1

It's not a bad habit, it's perfectly natural. It's only a bad habit when you're doing it wrong. Heck, it's probably more pleasurable than other things you could possibly do.

Join to vote! 6 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

chicagoman
03/21/2007

Masturbation 2

To addicting cant stop

Join to vote! 7 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

edt4
03/14/2007

Masturbation 3

I always liked the old Redd Foxx joke- "We were so poor when I was a kid in St. Louis, that if I hadn't of been a boy, I wouldn't have had nothin' to play with." When Lenny Bruce was on trial for obscenity, he wanted his lawyer to ask potential jurors whether they masturbated. If they denied it, Bruce wanted them disqualified, as that denial branded them as dishonest liars in his mind.

Join to vote! 8 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

irishgit
03/14/2007

Masturbation 4

Its only a BAD habit if you're doing it wrong.

Join to vote! 7 Helpful / 2 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

oscargamblesfr o
03/14/2007

Masturbation 3

Wiseguy wrote Maggie Thatcher 5 times- forget about choking the chicken that'll make you want to choke... period... don't know too many people with a thing for old  authoritarian British men in drag, but I guess there's a first for everything...

Join to vote! 5 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

myfairduchess
08/24/2006

Masturbation 3

it't not that fun. hormonally whacked out i enjoy it.

Join to vote! 3 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

adc103051
08/03/2006

Masturbation 5

I tried switching hands once in midstream and it was as if my left hand had the palsy or something. Nearly broke the damn thing.

Join to vote! 4 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

LastMessenger3
08/02/2006

Masturbation 5

Yes!it is bad ...in the most positive way.

Join to vote! 2 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

doobiesNhof
05/18/2006

Masturbation 5

After all these years I thought it was a necessity not a habit. Oh well, I guess I'm addicted then.

Join to vote! 4 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

hotel283
05/02/2006

Masturbation 5

Bad habit? Only if your doing it wrong...

Join to vote! 8 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

Djahuti
05/02/2006

Masturbation 2

When something is "habitual" it is done without thinking.So if someone is wanking themself in public,thats a bad habit-but what folks do in private with their own bodies is fine with me.In fact,some of the grouches we deal with probably need to "take care of business" and lighten up!

Join to vote! 5 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

ashleys
05/02/2006

Masturbation 5

One friend's drunken comment: "F**k it. It's too fun to quit."

Join to vote! 5 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 1 Disagree

lazyfreak101
04/29/2006

Masturbation 5

it's all worthwhile, as long as something comes from it...

Join to vote! 0 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

murthy
04/28/2006

Masturbation 5

This is a natural practice to relieve you from stress by fantasies and you are not harming anybody.

Join to vote! 3 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

numbah16tdhaha
04/27/2006

Masturbation 2

She's not naked on a cold day, is she?

Join to vote! 7 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

trebon1038
04/27/2006

Masturbation 2

I dont consider this a bad habit unless you are masturbating in public.

Join to vote! 3 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

Silver Eagle 252
04/01/2006

Masturbation 3

How could this possible be a bad habit. If we were not meant to masterbate, our hands would have been attached to our shoulders. It's a good stress reliever, it's a physical and emotional outlet and it releases a good dose of endorphins.

Join to vote! 6 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

BruceS
03/16/2006

Masturbation 5

Oh, c'mon! How can it be anything less than 5 of 5!?!? Gotta dig it! I wholeheartedly agree with Silverlock. Look, if "God" (insert favorite omnipotent deity here) hadn't wanted us to do it, He (She?) would certainly not have made it so pleasurable. I prefer to think of it as a little reward that we get for all the nastiness we have to endure as mortals. There are also definite health benefits from masturbation. Who knows, maybe "Heaven" (insert favorite eternal utopia here) is nothing more than everlasting sexual ecstasy... Anyone who says they don't do it, or at least don't enjoy it, seriously needs to seek qualified psychological help to deal with the crippling guilt (IMO, of course). Seriously, it's there for the taking - It's meant to be enjoyed! Fantasy is definitely NOT correlated in reality, that's why it's called "fantasy". Live it up!

Join to vote! 8 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

Ih8rateitall
03/13/2006

Masturbation 5

Hey what's so bad about this? This is America dudes!

Join to vote! 5 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

JohnSpina
02/25/2006

Masturbation 3

I know a guy who did this.I thought he'd have a bad sex life,but to my surprise,he held his own.lol

Join to vote! 7 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

JonTheMan
02/23/2006

Masturbation 1

Difficult to see how. For males, doing it frequently actually reduces the chance of prostrate cancer by a third.

Join to vote! 6 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

Silverlock
02/23/2006

Masturbation 5

There is no reason to feel guilty about masturbating. It's a physical necessity, particularly if you are not having sex. For males it relieves the physical build up of sperm that occurs in the testicles - notice if you don't masturbate you will tend to have dreams that have the same effect because the body naturally requires this release as it continues to produce sperm. It needs to get rid of the old to make room for the new. For females (and also males) it is a very effective reliever of frustration and stress. If thinking from a religious perspective, I personally think that if God didn't want us to do it, it wouldn't feel so good and it wouldn't have the health benefits that it does. I think sometimes (amongst other reasons) religious people feel guilty about masturbating because they feel bad about the thoughts they are having at the time as they conflict with their values. My feeling is that we expect too much from ourselves - we can only be who we are and if we're meant to change our thoughts this will happen over time. It can't be forced so relax. Anyway, it's better to masturbate then to sleep around all over the place out of sexual frustration! This is 2am rambling so sorry if this makes no sense :)

Join to vote! 5 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

gollygwiz
01/21/2006

Masturbation 1

I do not in any way see this as a bad habit. It's better than raping someone, don't ya think? Plus, it's a good stress release and feels sooo doggone good!

Join to vote! 0 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

USA sucks
01/04/2006

Masturbation 1

But, isnt masturbation unwholly, im not to sure, my new years reasalution, i think thats how you spell it, is to quit.

Join to vote! 3 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

CanadaSucks
12/29/2005

Masturbation 1

My wife doesn't think so. . ."I can't #$## every SINGLE time you want!!!"

Join to vote! 5 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

andrewmc
12/28/2005

Masturbation 1

I wouldn't consider it a bad habit because it's natural and healthy. I will admit I am addicted to it though. If I don't do it at least once or twice a day I feel overly horny like I'd screw one of my ugly ass teachers which is not a good thing.

Join to vote! 5 Helpful / 0 Funny / 0 Agree / 0 Disagree

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3.76
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