#179 - Rocky IV (1985) 1

I'm waiting for the one where Rocky is summoned from the grave via steroid-enhanced tanna leaves by the ghost of Apollo Creed in order to fight that one last Ultimate Battle Royale against whatever nemesis we've determined is the antithesis of the Star Spangled Banner, Mom's Apple Pie, and Wal-Mart (it kinda depends on who happens to be our enemy of the moment----maybe it'll be a monstrous, Lovecraftian result of the cloning of Osama-Bin-Laden, Saddam Hussein, Michael Moore, and a rabid junkyard dog). Talia Shire is too old and has made enough money to play the part, so Ann Coulter will fill in as Adrian. Bill O'Reilly will play the manager; instead of Mickey, he's called Tito in this version, and O'Reilly will play him with a Spanish accent, thereby displaying the diversity of his thespian talents. Rush Limbaugh will portray Paulie as a pill-sodden dreg of humanity who finds redemption...actually, he'll remain a pill-sodden dreg of humanity (after all, it's Rush Limbaugh). The theme music will be done by Toby Keith; loving narration provided by a breathless Sean Hannity. Now That's Entertainment!