The South Park Casa Bonita episode.

I knew this girl in college (I will call her "Debby") that had a very strange relationship with her boyfriend (from here on "Jerry"). Jerry was probably about six or eight years older than Debby, uptight with his religion, rather quiet and extremely boring. He was the type of guy who could make an entire room uncomfortable with his mere presence. One day I was over visiting friends at Debby's house when she and Jerry came in. They had just gotten back from Arby's and had some roast beef sandwiches to eat, as Jerry was quite hungry. They also came in in the middle of a vicious argument. The fight continued to escalate (much to everyone else's discomfort) and finally Debby, passing the breaking point, stormed out of the house and drove off. An extremely mad Jerry, torn between either the desire to finish the argument, make amends or the equally urgent desire to ease his hunger pains, RAN after Debby with his already opened sandwich in his hand. As he got about fifty feet away from the house in full sprint he actaully took a bite from it. This bizarre non-sequitur was such a relief from an otherwise tense situation that it made everyone in the room laugh to the point of tears. I never looked at Jerry quite the same after that.

My friends and I used to walk our neighbors huge mutt dog. We seriously had to use three leashes at once to take her out because she'd snap them so easily. One day we were walking near a stream and I guess she decided she was hot so she ran down the extremely steep hill into the water...with my friend Aly still attatched to the leash. Jeff ran after her and grabbed her feet but the dog kept going, dragging them both down the hill. I couldn't do anything because I was laughing so hard. I swear it was like I was watching a cheesy comedy movie.

Probably my friend Justin the time he put on a pink tu-tu while looking for costumes for The Sound of Music. He danced around the room and then fell over a box of clothes and then into a rack of clothes.

A sergeant in my local police force who is built like Kane dumping some poor shoplifter onto his head after this schmuck took a poke at the officer. Sarge used a one-handed scoop slam....part of me was cringing for the guy's banged up melon (dumped onto the corners of a joint in my concrete parking lot) and part of me was dying laughing at the fool for having the stupid notion he was gonna punch out a guy who was a foot taller and had a good 50 pounds at least of solid muscle on him.

I didn't see this one either, but a guy that I was on ship with hooked up with an authentic Thai "Lady-boy." I did see the pictures from the bar and they were priceless.

I never "saw" this, but I heard about it. This guy was very drunk and riding a motorcycle in the winter wearing just a v- neck t-shirt, when he crashed into the poorbox of a church and passed out. When he woke up, he was freezing and raided the poorbox for warmer apparel, somehow drove home, and passed out again. When he woke up the next morning, he found out that he was attired completely in women's clothes.

It was late 1974 or early 1975 and I was working in the parts department of a Lincoln-Mercury dealership. The mechanic / customer window as well the parts department entrance (which was left open during business hours) both faced the shop. A few feet from our entrance was one of the bays where cars were repaired and it was assigned to a mechanic who I will call "Wally." A 1971 Buick Riviera with a 455 cu in engine had been taken in on trade and Wally was given the job of checking it over. The first thing that he wanted to do was a compression test. For those who are not familiar, a compression test is done by removing a spark plug and a compression gauge is installed in its place. The engine is cranked over a few times and then you read the gauge, comparing the reading to the other cylinders in the engine. The safest way to do this is to remove all of the spark plugs so that the engine spins easily and disable the ignition system. If one chooses to leave the spark plugs in (except for the cylinder that you are testing) the ignition system MUST be disabled to prevent the other spark plugs from firing. Instead of doing this, Wally removed the carburetor. On the old 455 engines the gas feed line sits directly in front of the carburetor. He did not disable the ignition system and when he cranked the engine, raw gas poured into the hole where the carburetor used to be. He successfully did the test on the driver side but every time that he cranked the engine, more gas was dumped into the open hole. When he went to do the passenger side, he sat on the fender and with a remote starter switch, cranked the engine. All of a sudden the engine started. Keep in mind that there was no carburetor so it was running at more than wide open throttle. I was in one of the parts department aisles when suddenly I heard an engine start and begin screaming at extremely high revolutions, the parts department began to fill up with smoke and mechanics were yelling at the top of their voices in obvious panic "Turn it off! Turn it off! Turn it off!" As the engine ran at full speed gas continued to pour in the open hole and also sprayed on the top of the engine. Before Wally could react, so much gasoline had been dumped into the engine that it mixed with the engine oil and just as I reached the entrance to the shop I saw a flash of light and heard one of the loudest explosions I've ever heard in my life. (so much fuel had mixed with the oil both before and after the engine started that the oil exploded) The next thing I knew I was covered with oil and I saw the valve covers (with the bolts still attached to the engine) bouncing around the shop making loud pinging noises as they struck light fixtures, walls, and the ceiling. All of the other mechanics were diving under their cars for cover. Ignition wires, vacuum hoses and many of their connecting pieces flew all over the shop and came down as if it was raining black spaghetti. The oil dipstick launched like a rocket and got jammed in one of the wire cages that protected the shop lights. Everything that was within the line of sight of the engine got sprayed with oil. But the funniest part of all was the way Wally was literally blown off the fender. It was like something out of a cartoon. With arms and legs extended forward he was propelled backwards, ass first, into the workbench which sent everything on the bench flying in all directions. Wally wasn't seriously hurt (although it took him a few minutes to come to his senses and realize what had happened) but his front was covered with oil from the engine, and his back was covered in transmission fluid, STP, and whatever else he fell into when he crashed into his workbench. The oil pan and timing cover remained on the engine but were distorted to the point where they needed to be replaced. For weeks we were finding pieces of the Buick in different corners of the shop and we teased Wally mercilessly about it. (Hey Wally, there's a PCV valve and some vacuum hoses behind the soda machine. Do you need them?) The Buick eventually recovered with no serious damage but the sight of parts flying through the air, mechanics ducking for cover, and Wally being thrown backwards into the workbench rates as the funniest thing that I have ever witnessed. (Ha! This actually got me an unhelpful! It looks as if my troll is an ex Lincoln-Mercury mechanic. Hey Wally..... There's a vacuum tee with a large hose and a brake booster check valve under the wheel alignment machine. Do you need them?)

The Siamang monkeys at the local zoo. They hoot, they holler, they swing from limb to limb with abandon. They are like a bunch of raucous salesmen.

I was in a game preserve in Africa and visitors stayed in these one or two room bungalows. There were hundreds of wild baboons that roamed the area, and many of them would come right near the bungalows and do all sorts of crazy things. I happened to walk outside of my bungalow one day and witness a couple of baboons running towards the area I was staying. I paid them no mind, until I heard a noise in the bungalow next to mine. I looked over and saw the baboon peak through the door to the bungalow with an apple in its hand. A few second later I hear a scream and the baboon flees the bungalow with an older lady wearing absolutely nothing at all(picture 60 year old boobs flapping as she runs) chasing the baboon out of her bungalow. The lady shrieked and swiped at the baboon for about 10 second before she realized (1) that she had run outside completely naked and (2) that I had been standing there observing the whole thing. She quickly ran back inside...clothed herself...and returned to try and shoo the baboon away. The baboon stood back several feet from her and didn't back down while eating her apples and cookies from her bungalow.

Stop me if I've told you this one before. I was about 30, working for a bank in Accounting. My assistant, Kap, about my age, came in one morning with a huge bandage, bigger than a football helmet chin strap, all over his chin, blood still seeping through the gauze after about 48 hours. Now, Kap was a rugby player, whom I often (daily) admonished about how he should stop participating in such a violent, barbaric sport. Sometimes I'd resort to edt4's tactic (or is it planetary?) of implying perhaps he was gay to participate in such a vile, all-male, physical activity. To be honest, he wasn't (isn't) a big guy and I was worried (selfishly) he'd end up in intensive care sometime, leaving me in the lurch. Anyway, he comes into my office, I look at him and roll my eyes. That does it, no more friggin' rugby, ok? I didn't do it in the rugby game, it happened at the party after. Apparently, boys being boys, a competition had started and escalated about who could wow the crowd performing various creative physical acts. The guy before him had done a flag and the crowd went crazy, he had to out do him. He set a plastic cup on the floor, climbed up on a barstool . . . and did a swan dive, crushing the plastic cup with his chest, forgetting only one detail . . . holding his head UP so his CHIN WOULDN'T HIT THE FLOOR FIRST!! The display of considerable blood, intermingled with the inch of beer already on the floor, added to the pleasure of the audience, and won him the permanent respect of his teammates, as well as a handful of emergency room personnel. My admiration was a bit more grudging.

I don't know if it was the funniest thing I've EVER seen,but this one's up there: I was engaged to a young lady and we were sharing an apartment.We were in our early 20s.She had come up in a tough neighborhood,and was quite fearless,or so I thought....Although she was sweet,and very smart-came from poverty and did very well for herself,etc.,I had never seen her afraid of anyone or anything.Well, one night we were watching TV,we had a bed that was very low to the floor,and all of a sudden a mouse runs by...Well- Up jumps my fearless fiance,screaming at the top of her lungs and dancing on a table! I just lost it:seeing her behave like that because of a MOUSE just busted me up.She was FURIOUS at me,but the madder she got,the harder I laughed.(you can guess where I ended up sleeping that night!)

This guy in a business suit on the opposite train platform to myself just dying to tuck into a sandwich he just bought, only dropping it a few seconds later and then kicking it in absolute anger, o'h the irony.

my friend and i were at the store shopping when 15 minutes later she walked up to me and told me we had to go back to her house. i was sad to cut our shopping trip so short and asked her why? she stared at me for a moment before she saidfor me to look down and when i did i noticed she had 2 different shoes on. i just burst out laughing. i couldn't help it. she held her head high hoping noone noticed and we left.

Funniest that comes to mind right now happened back in '96 when I hosted my first house party. Parents were in New York for the weekend so I made the necessary arrangements. Things were going great, had people out in the pool sipping margarita's, others dancing in the living room with some Warren G in the background, upstairs had some couples, outside had a fire with a few stragglers. Well my buddy Bryan and I were playing strip poker on my porch with 2 hot 18 year olds (older women for us at the time) and they were down to their panties, and we our boxers. At that time by token fat friend Shawn storms in and yells Titties!! Titties!! I wanna touch em! And as he goes for them one girl freaks and runs out onto my deck. What she doesn't realize at the time is that my door is closed - the glass is pretty much see through when you've had a few. The girl slams into the door - basically sticking to it for what seemed like an eternity but was probably 1 second - and then the whole glass door goes down, and she goes down with it. Then Shawn miraculously helps her up and grabs some wood glue and a ladder and fixes the whole thing like it never happened. We grabbed them a couple wine coolers and the game never skipped a beat. Awesome.

I've seen a lot of funny things but I can't say I can list the funniest thing I've ever seen. I tend to laugh at things which aren't meant to be funny like Benny Hinn being an idiot and shouting at people on the stage. I often find immature boys funny (not a mean immature, but a funny one), especially when they give stupid answers to the teacher. Or someone doing a loud fart in the males toilets which sounds like a didgeridoo. But overall, I can't say there is one thing which beats them all.

A couple of months ago, we were doing some things around town, and we decided we were hungry but didn't have the time for a sit down restaurant so we drove to Wendy's and my husband hates onions. As soon as he went thru the drive thru, he opened his sandwich, told my son to open his window (he was riding shotgun) because on his own side was the brick building. It wouldn't be good to chuck an onion at the building I don't think, well anyway my son opens his window and my husband throws the onion out. My son rolls up his window real quick and my husband had decided his tomato was too pink and decided to throw it out too, only it was too late as my son had rolled up the window, instead the tomato splatted against the window, and hung there while everyone in the van busted up laughing. My husband is a serious guy said it's not funny like a stubborn 5-yr old which made us all laugh so hard our sides were aching.

I don't know. There were two 95-year old men at a nursing home jawwing at each other over a young woman. Both were jealous when the lady winked and said hi to them. Both cursed each other out. Because one of them thought the lady was saying hi to him. Both got their canes and started hitting each other like in a sword-fight. One of them dropped his cane and the other guy threw his cane away. Then both wanted to box each other with their fists. The funniest thing was both men struggled to take off their shirts. They tried and tried and tried and tried but couldn't. It was a funny scene to watch because they couldn't get their shirts off. So off they went their separate ways with no punches thrown. I think they still hate each other.

This is a little bad, but I laughed for I gotta say, at least an hour after seeing it....... When I was in my Freshman year of Highschool, there was this kid that was a little weird, every school had one. His name was Scot, He was either picked on or ignored by pretty much everyone. I had always felt bad for him, he wore the same clothes EVERY day, and would never eat at lunch, he was pretty poor. He never talked to anyoone at all. I probably should have been a good person and tried to be nice to him instead of just feeling bad, but that would have been pretty awkward after what happened.................. Well this one day, I was walking into the boys bathroom, and I heard an interesting sound. It sounded like somebody having a seizure, so I went to the area of the bathroom that the sound was coming from. Well, it was Scot, and he wasn't having a seizure, he was enjoying himself, and making enjoyable sounds. I tried not to as I walked very fastly, but i BURST out laughing, and he heard me. He ran into a stall (which is where he should have probably been in the first place) and I walked out into the hallway purple from laughing so hard that I couldn't breathe. I still sort of feel horrible about it because he was taunted about it for the rest of high school. But I still laugh when I think about it. I must be one deeply disturbed individual. lol

Some friends and I were out four wheeling one cold November morning (remember this), my dad had just crawled the jeep down a 2-foot ledge and all most rolled it. A friend behind us decides to bonzie of the ledge. When he landed, his ice chest flew out of his jeep, turned over and dump ice, and water on him. Funniest thing I have seen.

I'm not sure, but if I watch that interview with runaway bride Jennifer Wilbanks tonight, that could possibly be a runner-up.

Okay unfortunately the funniest thing I've ever seen I was actually the person who did it... but let me tell the story anyhow. One day not long ago I had just been hired as a manager of a health club in NYC named Crunch that had a full Yoga studio. Never having taken it before, and seeing how avid some of these people- I call the Yogies- were, I was interested in finding out what all the big hoopla was about...so I decide to take a class. Now Yogies aren't exaclty your normal run of the mill people. This Yoga stuff is religion for them...they're pretty damn fanatical to be totally honest. The doors to the studio are closed shut at the beginning of class and your not allowed to talk (except for the instructor) after the class has started. The studio was in the bottom floor of our facility, had a very low ceiling, no ventilation and the standard temperature was about 85 degrees. It must be noted that these Yogies weren't exactly consistent with their showers and having sworn off anything on the Right, Right Guard was no friend either. But here I am, no shirt on, dead in the middle of 60 or so Yogies.. bear foot like them all. We start to stretch and breath.. hummmmmm.... huuummmmmm ..... feel the movements says the instructor... breath in through your nose out through your mouth... hhummmmm huuummm... as the class progresses about 40 minutes in, we start to move into more advanced positions.. and Im actually starting to kinda get into this whole Yoga thing. I'm dripping with sweat and actually immune to the pungent aroma now that I am one with all the other Yogies. We rise from doggie down position to a position called Invader one... where one foot is on the floor your hands are together in front of you and your bent over in a t-like shape with the other foot and leg in the air behind you... huuummmmm... the instructor says quietly.. feel the movements. The room is ever so quiet, hot and sticky... yet I am one with all the Yogies... huuummmm hummmmm... as Im in the Invader one position the instructor leans next to me and whispers in my ear pull your abs in tight while you balance on your one foot while she places here hand on my abdominals to help me feel the flex... as I squeeze my abdominals inward.. the steamy room is ever so quiet.. and then I ripped the biggest, loudest, stinkiest fart in the history of man! For the next 40 minutes that fart emanated throughout the room, never circulating, never disapating... hovering like a death cloud... for all the Yogies to bask in... here I was stuck in the middle of 60 Yogies, defiling their religion and having the hardest time to hold in my laughter. Though I'm probably not doing this story justice, I still am having the hardest time containing myself just typing it.

There have been a lot of them, but I'll say the look on a classmates face after he let loose with a wall shaking fart that apparently slipped out when he bent over to pick up his pen. This was in seventh grade, a long time ago for me, and I still laugh just as hard as I did that day.

Once when my sister and I were in Ireland we went to one of those castle banquet tourist thingies that are supposed to make you feel like you've just punched Middle Ages on your Wayback Machine. Well, a photographer took this GAWD AWFUL photo of us sitting there with a big glass of wine each and ridiculous glassy-eyed looks on our faces. I don't know what happened, but from the minute I laid eyes on it I started making cracks and it wasnt long before we both started laughing and could NOT stop. Tears were streaming down my face by the time I finally did. It was just one of those weird times when something just hits you - or maybe in this case accidently channel a wicked leprechaun.

Any time in the past that I saw a beautiful girl dressed to the hilt violently fall down! (falling down stairs trying to stop herself, tripping and dress flying up around her head..etc. LOL! That is always so damn funny!

It might not be funny to anyone else. but years ago when I was a kid, my family and I stayed at a motel at Palm Springs, California. One day we were all at the pool except my dad, who was in the room watching the ballgame on TV. While I was in the pool with my brother, and my mother was laying back getting some sun, my father, who was an extreme girl watcher, came out by the pool to get some ice, at the same time a really good looking girl in a bikini was getting ice too. As she was walking away, my father started to walk back to the room but he never took his eyes off of her backside. My mother, my brother and I were watching my dad the whole time, as he, fully clothed, and carrying the bucket of ice, and his eyes and his thoughts completely engrossed in this girl, walked right into the pool. My mother couldn't stop laughing, niether could anyone at the pool. It was classic. My poor father, who was balding on top, looked so ridiculous as he was climbing out of the pool, as he tried his best to laugh it off. It had to have been one of his most embarrassing moments, and one our funniest. we teased him about that for years. my dad, who always had a reply for everything, was always at a loss for words about that.

It wasn't at the time, but in retrospect..... Gary Hart's follow me around news conference. I was on his staff at the time and I remember sharing what the hell is he thinking glances with my colleagues. Maybe not thigh slapping hilarity, but a fine ironic humour.