MTV Cribs 1

Nothing more "uplifting" than watching some untalented boorish lout, his body adorned with what look like jailhouse tattoos, insouciantly escorting the MTV crew around an estate that would have made the Romanovs proud, while you're barely functioning in your 3 crappy rooms, wondering whether you're going to be able to pay the plumber when he comes or whether that check you sent to Allstate will bounce. A show to make you take up drinking again.